Tired of discussions about weather? Tom Pattinson, Positive.News, offers five insightful ways to spark more meaningful exchanges: pick the place, ask 'why' then wait, be more vulnerable yourself, explore values, and stay present. By fostering authenticity, compassionately listening, and truly engaging, these strategies can help us move from surface to substance and make every conversation count. After all, "the most precious gift we can offer anyone is our attention," shares Thích Nhat Hanh, author of "The Art of Communicating."

1. Choose a place where you can both relax and feel unhurried — a quiet café, a sunny park bench, or a path where you can walk side by side. When the setting is calm and free from constant distractions, it becomes easier to be fully present with one another and to let trust naturally grow.
2. Let curiosity lead the conversation. Gently ask “why?” or “tell me more,” and then give space for the answer. When someone shares, invite them a little deeper with open questions like, “How did that affect you?” Allow them to speak in their own time; often, the most meaningful insights emerge when there’s no pressure to rush.
3. Be willing to open up, too. Sharing something real — a challenge you’re navigating, a shift in how you see things, or a hope you’re working toward — can quickly deepen a conversation. Your authenticity creates an invitation for the other person to do the same, forming a connection that feels genuine and human.
4. Explore values and lived experiences together. Conversations become richer when they move beyond surface topics into the stories and principles that shape who we are. Ask about the moments that have influenced their outlook or what matters most to them. This kind of curiosity builds understanding and closeness.
5. Above all, stay present. Offer your attention through eye contact, gentle affirmations, and reflecting back what you hear. When someone feels truly seen and given space to unfold their thoughts, you create a shared moment of connection — one that lingers long after the conversation ends.

This holiday season and moving into the new year, these make great goals to focus on in your important relationships.
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​For more information about the 4 week series using the book,"The Fourth Quarter of Your Life," and to sign up: 4th Quarter

Have you heard about the legend of Secret Santa? It can actually be traced back to a single act of kindness in Houston, Mississippi. It was 1971 and a homeless man had wandered into town, starving. The stranger stopped at the Dixie Diner and ordered the biggest breakfast on the menu. Not having any money, his plan was to sneak out before the bill came. But the owner, a guy named Ted Horn, sensed what was about to happen. So he snuck up behind the guy with a $20 bill in his hand and said, "I think you may have dropped this."

The homeless stranger was a man named Larry Stewart, who vowed that if he ever got rich, he would return the favor in spades. Larry eventually made millions in cable and long distance and became the first Secret Santa, his identity revealed only after he was diagnosed with terminal cancer in 2006. The current Secret Santa is Larry's good friend. Over the last decade, the new Secret Santa has run the total to more than $2 million. Behind the giving is the heart to spread joy at the Christmas season.

Watch how this Secret Santa got started with "On the Road With Steve Hartman."
www.youtube.com/watch?v=IL8gDOd6xCs

If you need a reason to believe in the goodness of people, watch more of the episodes at the links below:
www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLotzEBRQdc0eX6sErNJED9JuHzJ1vcIu_
www.facebook.com/OnTheRoadCBS/

For more information and to sign-up, 4th Quarter

A few months ago, someone who reads my blog reached out to me to ask, "Have you heard of the book 'The Fourth Quarter of Your Life?' I think you should offer a webinar series based on the book." So of course, I had to find the book and check it out for myself. The premise of the book is that life consists of four quarters:

• First quarter: 1-20 years old
• Second quarter:  21-40 years old
• Third quarter:  41-60 years old
• Fourth quarter:  61-80 years old
• Older than 80 is Bonus Time!

​The authors state in the introduction that what makes aging unbearable is the mistaken belief that it can be avoided. Everyone knows this isn't possible and yet, we often persist in our avoidance and denial which makes us miserable. As I am reading this practical workbook style book, I feel encouraged and empowered to look at my fourth quarter in a new light.

If you are 61+ or approaching the fourth quarter, I invite you to explore your thoughts and feelings on aging by using this book as a guide. The purpose of the book states that this is a practical guide to help you:

• Live the fourth quarter based on proven life principles
• Clearly establish meaning and direction for your life
• Develop the clarity necessary to make good decisions
• Identify your hopes and dreams
• Establish what you need and want most at this time in your life
• Learn to say no

I will be offering a four-week series to support you in this endeavor. The series will provide a supportive environment to grapple with, share, and learn together with others on this journey.  Meeting on four Fridays, beginning on January 16, 2026, will be the opportunity to hear from and share with others. How you decide to progress through the content of the book will be up to you and your schedule. For more information:  4th Quarter

​Giving the gift of experiences is really about giving the gift of moments—those irreplaceable slices of time that stay with us long after the day has passed. It might look like sharing the excitement of a local sporting event, the magic of a concert, or the wonder of a live theater performance. It could be laughing together at the movies, wandering through an arcade, or feeling like kids again at an amusement park. Even simple outings—a splash-filled afternoon at a water park, a trampoline session full of giggles, or a friendly round of mini-golf—can become treasured memories. And sometimes the most unforgettable gifts are the extraordinary ones: the quiet awe of a hot air balloon ride, the peaceful rhythm of a train journey, or the delight of watching a magic show up close. 

​Memberships and passes are another way to give joy that lasts all year. They turn ordinary weekends into adventures—whether it’s visiting the zoo, exploring an aquarium, or returning again and again to a children’s museum. Passes to a botanical garden or indoor play arena invite curiosity and connection, while ski passes or a season ticket to a favorite amusement park create traditions that grow with time.

Experiences can also be gifts of learning—moments that help someone discover who they are becoming. Cooking and baking lessons bring creativity to life in the kitchen. Music lessons, whether it’s piano, guitar, or voice, open doors to self-expression. Sports classes like karate or skateboarding build courage and confidence, while creative workshops—pottery, painting, even circus arts—invite a childlike sense of wonder.

And then there are the adventures that bring families closer. A simple staycation at a nearby hotel gives everyone a chance to slow down and savor being together. A camping trip or fishing day invites quiet conversations and shared challenges. Time at the pool or beach becomes a celebration of sunshine and connection. And traveling to a national park or a beloved vacation spot often becomes the kind of memory people talk about for years.

Some of the sweetest experiences happen right at home. A family game night with popcorn and laughter, a cozy movie night with a fun theme, a baking day using a new library cookbook—all of these become moments woven into the story of home. Building something together—a treehouse, a giant LEGO set, even a backyard obstacle course or a kite-flying afternoon—reminds us that the best gifts aren’t things at all, but the time we choose to spend with the people we love.

Where you are thinking of gifts for children, grandchildren, parents, grandparents, siblings or friends, consider how you might give the gift of time and experiences.